Here's a true story that I made up about the day I went to the pet store! (Actually I didn't make it up, but hey)

I like monkeys.

The pet store was selling them for five centsa piece.

I thought this was odd since they are normally a couple thousand apiece.

I decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth, so I bought 200 of them.

I like monkeys.

I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car.

I let one of them drive. His name was Sigmund. He was retarded.

In fact, none of them were really bright. They kept punching themselves in the genitals.

I laughed.

They punched me in the genitals.

I stopped laughing.

When I got home, I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new environ...
(continues)